Writing Is My Cure

My Name Is Nishat & I Write To Stay Sane. I Post Everyday At 8PM CST* (Usually)

Anonymous said: Things haven't been the easiest for me in the last few years...but I'm finally at a good place in my life, even though there's still a lot of bad going on in it. And I just wanted to share that with someone.

I’m really glad you thought of me to share this with, this made me really happy :) its always lovely to hear about people finding the light in dark places. heres to hoping that the rest of that badness vanishes!

In a dream I heard God ask me
“What does it feel like to be alive?”
And I said back to him,
“It’s when she says ‘I love you’ for the first time.”

There are back porches that miss the way we kissed
With our hands pressed against each other’s cheeks.
We kept fireflies at bay as we smiled against a June sun
Slipping into the hands of the trees.

I can’t breathe.

This summer air is too hot for my lungs.
I burned my throat trying to
Keep you in
My mouth,
So you spilled out
Like the rain that drowned the earth
For almost a whole week.
This was a storm I was expecting.

I’m supposed to be an adult but I feel like
I’m just a stranger renting out this skin,
Taking long drives at night through dimly lit
Suburban streets that haven’t seen tender care in years.
The wheels pound the pavement
While the wind, and desperate pop punk songs
Pound against my ears.

This place isn’t the same.
I’m not changing.
I just started to open up my eyes.

My body is a park for every homeless heart.
I haven’t yet signed a lease on love
But I’ve paying rent on it for years.
When it comes down to it,
I am just an empty house.

You loved me like I was important but I guess
I was just another boy to kiss.
I could’ve sworn you were my cure,
Now I see how you’ve made me sick.

In a dream I heard God ask me
“What does it feel like to die?”
And I replied
“When she says ‘I love you’ for the last time.”

—   "This Is Not A Break-Up Poem, This Is A Heartbreak Poem (Summer Influenza)" - Nishat Ahmed

Anonymous said: I am so jealous of your life. Sure you have pain and rough times, but you are able to take those times and turn them into beautiful words that help people. When I feel like shit all I do is have to sit around and feel it. It would be so relieving to be able to express it and help people like you!! Never stop writing!

please, my life is nothing to be jealous of! theres definitely enough shitty parts in it to make it undesirable. cherish yours and the good moments you get! you can do exactly what i do, just pick up a pen and start getting it on the page. Thank you for this message though!

Anonymous said: I also have waves of hard depression often.. Like, I feel alright for a few weeks then this huge wave of depression knocks me down and I feel like everything In my life is not good and there's no point. Is that what you have too? What does it mean? Ahh.

Yeah that’s exactly how mine comes. It’s the freakin’ worst. I don’t know what it means, really. I don’t think theres an extra layer to it, it’s just depression. Do you ever have it where you can feel it coming, like a storm or just a shadow in your mind’s peripheral? Cause thats how it works for me. I know I have one coming soon and its the worst feeling :/

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I want to find fragments of your skeleton like seashells washed up against the shore. My bones have never been broken,
Only fractured.
My heart has never been broken,
Only fractured.

You are too bright so I shut my eyes
But you are not bright in the beautiful way that people describe beautiful girls.
You are the kind of bright that hurts,
Like a lit matchstick to my eyelids
You burn holes into my retina. Don’t get me wrong;
You are still beautiful.

When it rains I long to wrap
Your body around me like a cloud
So you could run your static fingers against my spine.
Once, we flourished like lightning.
Now, we crash like thunder.
When you speak (lie) to me through those pretty little teeth of yours
All about the love
You claim to have borne from the fruit of your chest
I can hear the cracks forming in your facade.
It sizzles like rain on humming power-lines.

My veins are tangled up around my wrists
The doctors say I might not make it,
One asked me why I did this.
My reply was that I was trying to get you out of me.

I could never hurt you
But I guess you could hurt me.

—   "I Swear To God I Am A Pacifist" - Nishat Ahmed

Anonymous said: Well Nish,you're so "far"

I’m sorry, I don’t know what this means :/

Anonymous said: Do you have any poems on break ups or how to deal with one?

I have a two piece poem that might be what youre looking for:

How To Deal With Heartbreak (Pt. 1)

How To Deal With Heartbreak (Pt. 2)

Anonymous said: Do you have any advice or poems on how to deal with being cheated on? :(

I don’t remember if I have any poems or not but if I were ever to be cheated on, I am done with that person. End of story. I don’t deal with that bullshit. Not in my fucking house. That’s the advice I have.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t save you.”

—   "But Darling Understand That I Barely Even Saved Myself (Six Word Story)" - Nishat Ahmed